Need advice

7 replies, Page 1

Nikita0108 2016-02-12 22:25:52

 

Hi,

Its been around 4 years I am married. I didnt know his name when I had to say yes. I never regret about it... at least not till date. 
I see my husband is quite indifferent towards me. I try my best to tell him nicely that it would be nice if we can share the house hold chores , that would be fun and we can finish fast. He ignores, he doesn't really try to help until I get serious. 
On his b'day I tried to jot down all our happy moments and kept in a box and gifted him.. asked him to open each a day, even after a week he didnt show the interest in opening one. I had hidden the box now, guess he forgot totally.
When I ask if we can go out anywhere, he thinks about spending money and he wont show the interest.
This weekend, he came up with some plan with his friends and left.
I know you might find these as trivial matters but being a women I am unable to wipe away matters frm my head. I tried explaining what matters to me.. you think I should beg and make sure I get what I want? Is there a better way? My work keeps me damn busy. 
Didnt know what to do on a Friday evening like this.. 
Jus wondering how can I do a compatibility check with my partner.. 

 Former member 2016-02-13 23:19:03

 

Hi Nikita I can understand ur feelings... Even I gotta same sort f prblm but it s with my in laws , dey AL tel him something so he will b away from me n my 2yr old baby ... Doesn't matter even if it s a year or more he will never tlk to us if his sister n mother put some rules to him.... ..
 

 Former member 2016-02-13 23:21:45

 

Nywys Nikita... U try gng fr park or dinner or some malls or just fr a walk at nyt, let him SPK something - make him to tlk frank...
 

pravso 2016-02-22 18:20:47

 

HI Nikita,
Happy to know that you still haven't given  up and trying a compatibility check with him even after 4 years. You are already in the right path, keep going. Not sure if you guys are blessed with a kid yet. If yes, your kid is your escape route out of this. If not... then try for one..:-) Both ways work.

Find mutual interests between you both. I am sure you must have done a lot of research on him these 4 years. Plan small outings, may be with friends or family. Gifts or treasure hunt definitely are not working. Try something more simple like listening to music together. Go out for more movies together. Take a stroll in the park. Tell him walking is good for health or else you would get heart attack sooner..:P Just kidding ..... Cook his favorite foods often. Discuss his topics of interest. News and current affairs i suppose. Make him talk more. The more he talks the closer you get to solving this. 

Keep yourself engaged in your passions and interests meanwhile.

Good Luck.

Praveen

 


mahya 2016-03-19 23:39:36

 

hi nikita.....
                      
most of the indian guys mentality is like that only...they dont want to do the house hold chores....but you should disscuss with him which things he should do or in which household chores he want to help u out with.....talk with him nicely....sometimes try  to get his attension sexually....if the man is happy with those things na then he will  do anything you tell him to do...dont let the spark in your marriage die quickly......try out different things...do the things which makes him happy....just dont give up.....just love him without any expection...one day he will realize all the things n he will start to do the things as u wish.......sometimes have disscussion with him...it will solve a lot of problems.....
 

mahya 2016-03-19 23:42:45

 

hi rathi...
                   dont let anyone come between u and ur husband...dont let misunderstanding happen between u both bocoz of them....
just always try to  make him urs....u talk with him daily...at least for some moments......make him realize that he has his family of his own also...the day he will realize this na..he will automatically will give more attension to u than this parents or sister....
 

shilpagajendra 2016-05-07 13:21:20

 

he nikita.. dont worry.. time will change.. i know its hard time.. i have gone through something like this. it was so funny when my sis in lay on sunday evening asked my hubby to come to mall with them and dont take us (us as in me and my daughter) as there will be crowed in mall. as if i have not seen crowd in my life bloody i travel by train everyday and i am in marketing job. but then i realised she use to keep her kids with us as in with my mom in law. so she use to feel that i will also keep my kid with them then 3 kids will b prob and she will not be able to go. i know funny but then one sunday evening i got ready and took my baby and said my goodbyes and head towards mall played with baby ate out. when we came back of course my hubby was annoyed and asked me why i went alone and i gave same ans "mall is very crowed" *wink*wink* try to find out way dont think too much negative. read divert your mind.. dont worry its bad phase and things will change have faith.
take care


 

apanditi 2016-05-13 13:00:41

 

Hi hope he will change
 

 

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