Extra-ordinarily intelligent, but extremely poor with discipline and focus

2 replies, Page 1

grounded 2022-01-23 14:55:54


I'm the father of an 8 year girl child that is highly intelligent( she can solve the rubic's cube on her own in minutes), extremely good reading and speaking skills, very articulate and multilingual reader/writer/speaker. She's just started learning classical music and she has a natural flair for it and is doing well there. As does she with sports. 

She's an extremely quick learner - provided she gets her focus in.

The biggest problem is her lack of focus, lack of discipline and disinterest in anything that needs persistence, longer focus or orderliness ( arranging her things properly, mainiting her toys, her bed, her books, finishing a meal in reasonable time, finishing exams within stipulated time, obeying reasonable instructions from elders, poor colouring skills etc, finishing 2 pages of writing in one sitting are some examples that she does extremely bad due to distractions). While she has always had these problems from much younger, it's a lot more pronounced in the last 2-3 years and is affecting her progress in a "formal" setup ( grading in school etc).

We have tried everything - reasoning, reprimanding, rewarding - nothing has worked. In fact, she's taken to defensive measures ( lying, talking back or disowning things). Schedules written up to help her sort her day better hasn't helped too. Us trying to mimic her schedule by setting an example ourselves hasn't worked too.

We're extremely worried that our disciplining might affect her adversely and at the same time, also worried that if we leave her to her means she will not realize her high potential. 

Her 4 year old sibling growing up in the same house has a diametrically opposite behavior compared to her - much more organized even though not as intelligent as her. How could this be possible with 2 kids growing up in the same house ?

Mani2606 2022-04-14 00:10:19


Hello sir, I am a father of. 7 year old boy. What I think, is that u have to be with the flow,as u have said the girl was very good in academic and extracurricular activities, u better know that your girl is very independent in herself, so don't need to change your earlier approach, just ask her and try to figure any particular reason..... Beat of luck And lastly it's my personal view, i can be wrong also so please, if u felt offended, i ma sorry Thank

maddymadhu 2022-10-09 19:29:01


I am facing a similar challenge with my girl.  I see the main reason for her is the digital influence that happened during the covid break.   Controlling her digital time is also not bringing her back. Please let me know if you found any ways to deal with the situation.


All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2008-2023 Parentree