learning difficulty

12 replies, Page 1

suteja 2009-11-16 17:09:48



my 8 yr old daughter is not  able to write her exams in school properly, though she studies well with me she does a lot of spelling mistakes when she is writing her ans in exams she herself is not able to recogonise that she has committed her mistakes and at times she is not aware that she has committed a mistakes and would correct it only if i point it out ton her this year she is not able to concentrate on studies but rather is talking more about her friends and theur attitude. please help me how to cope with my daughter.

PD 2009-11-16 18:02:27




Friends do mean a lot to kids esp. at this age.....they form gangs and do things together, want to do things to belong to a group etc.

Is this a new problem for her or did she always have difficulties with writing/ spelling etc.? It might be that she is just too preoccupied with other things. Maybe u could work out a deal / contract together and make sure both of u agree on it. Maybe u cud allocate time for her to just chat about her friends, interests etc. andthen a special time when she has to make an effort to concentrate on her studies. When children are given a bit of freedom, they also learn that there is a certain responsibility that comes with that freedom.

When we were this age at school, our teachers used to get us to correct each others' papers.....that was more fun than always getting it corrected by the teacher! You could get her to correct your answers and maybe deliberately make the mistakes she does. This might tell u whether she really knows her spellings or not!

will be happy to help with more ideas if u need!

All the best! Every stage in parenthood is a challenge! We need to be positive and creative!





suteja 2009-11-17 17:45:43


thanks priya for ur valuable solution for my problem.

priya, i need ur help regarding my daughter , she is aleft handed girl & does all her work with left till second std her handwriting was a big problem i & her school took nil step to improve her writing & stamped her that she could never do better until she improved her writing though she was able to score more than 75 in each subject.so i to put her in a handwriting classes& i could see a lot of improvement in her writing with pencil but now her handwriting has becme bad because she is complled to write with pen this yr  that to with gel pen her preformance was average this term though i dicussed with her teacher she is not cooperating and she is just comparing with other children by giving me a reply that if her classmates are able to do why can;t she write with pen can i give sometime for my daughter to change her writing or should i put little force on her moreover i can't understand her class techer attitude last saturday she had school for half day but she had to attend her dance class so could'nt go to s'oolthe next day isigned her diary reasoning the same but the teacher had replied byasking my daughter to sit in the dance class forever and never come to school my daughter feit bad and questioned me why i didnt write as fever i am feeling really uncomfortable with this school should ichange this school my daughter also is uncomfortable wioth her school please help what to do


PD 2009-11-17 19:02:14



where do u live? which school does your daughter go to?

The teacher's attitude and behaviour is apalling! But this is the case in many schools. You could change schools but that may or may not solve the problem. And I think we shud all do our little bits to change the system....we parents need to question, ask, suggest......stepping away from the problem is not the solution.

But that is the larger picture. For your daughter, it is important for me and us to understand her strengths and difficulties. That is very difficult to do online as we r talking about kids here....did u change her hand for certain tasks? does she write with her left hand? left handers hold the pencil a bit differently and also need to position their paper and hand a bit differently so that they can see what they r writing....they actually would not have a problem if they were to write right to left!

I am a parent of a 4 yr old and special educator by profession. I can help u but need to know more about your daughter first. - how she is in other areas, etc.

The first step towards solving any problem with kids is to understand them and their needs.....look at things from their point of view.

why don't we talk or email each other and understand this better?



suteja 2009-11-24 14:13:01


thanks priya for ur reply,

well i live in thiruvottriyur north chennai & my daughter is studying in st kevins A.I high school

about my daughter i have never tried to change her hand

she is good at grasping things easily be it studies or any day today things

she is avery good dancer and she learns the tough steps in bharatnatyam very fast than her classmates

she is very soft spoken giril and never shouts or fights back with her friends even if they bully her but right from LKG she has the problem of copying from the board and all her class would say that she is not doing the job of copying and her hand writing is worse in her third std her teacher said that she never used to sit in her place for even four minutes and just used to get out of her place and roam about in the class but this attiude has changed completly and now i feel she is aware of what she is doing and where she is but still she is having the problem of this copying from the board added to this from this year the written work is been recited by the class teacher which she is not able to write though she is writing neatly at home she is not able to write in school i dont know why and more so she will not fight or show her anger when her class mates bully her but comes to me and cries she never reacts when her class mates eat her snacks in front of her but in turn she has asked me not to give her snacks she always has a smile and is very friendly with all

well this is my daughter priya i hope ur reply will help her awaiting it soon


PD 2009-11-25 23:18:39



There seem to be a lot of small issues.....maybe they are all linked in some way.

Copying from the board: where does she sit in the class? is it right in front? is there enough light? is there a glare on the board? ps. check out these things first.

does she complain of headaches / pains etc.? have u checked her vision ever? the best thing wud be to ask her what she finds easy and what she finds difficult. she might be able to tell us what the issues are.

a good, positive self esteem is very important for any child. from what u say, she seems to be abit insecure or on-guard at school. we need to teach her the skills to cope with bullying, being more assertive etc. changes in school will be difficult but not impossible, and long drawn out, becuase it involves changing people's mindsets. I would suggest you do as much as possible of making her feel good about herself at home.

depending on what comes out of your talking to your daughter, maybe u can decide on change of schools.



suteja 2009-11-30 18:59:45



once again thanks priya i did have a talk with my daughter with regard to change of school and she said that she will be very happy if i change her school and she had already started preparing for her entrance exam which i told her that she had to write . and regarding her eye sight i had taken a appointment with an eye s'list. hope to keep in touch with u. 


srujana 2010-02-04 14:36:44



 i just feel you should get her assesment done for LD which will be of great help to guide and fill up the gaps of reading and writing.special educators do it.later stages will be difficult if ignored.its just that they need to understand the science behind the languages.all the best.pls dont delay.


suteja 2010-02-19 18:04:54


hi priya

i want an urgent advice from u

now iam hunting for admission for my two daug  in and around mylaporei am changing them to cbse now they are in anglo board i am living in thiruvottriyur have u heard about his place! well it is 10km from madras high court .though i tried in harishree i got a negative answer i got a conf reply from the school grove and also in calibere run by y.g.p schoolsbut the reviews about this school is not good i am trying in p.s school also moreso the fees in the first two schools are high and my husband is opposing to such high fees payment though with gods grace we are fin strong and also the distance they are going to travel not less than 30km per day he feels that these schools are a bit far away from our place we cannot shift from our place as i have two grannys and it is our own house and shifting is impossible priyya i live in north chennai and its culture is totally diffrent from south chennai where children seem to be more independent and are more updated than us socially being so there is aschool in our place it is acbse school just 5min drive from my home where my husband is very much interested in admmiting my daug's he is of the opinion that the school is close by ,the fees is normal and there is no hi fi type of children and they need not go far awy tostudy my concern is if we make our children study in our place then they would not match with the city children and they would be lagging in english and other aspects like socialising etc idon't know what to do plse help whether to follow my husb or try for some city schools and i don't know whether my children would fit in the city peer group of children


PD 2010-02-20 00:01:32


Hi Suteja

I don't know if I am qualified to advice u......but anyway, will share my thoughts. The decision is something both of u must take together I think.

I don't know very much about the schools in North Chennai as I have lived in south chennai all my life! But maybe some reviews on Parentree could help u. U could also post it on a school admission discussion board maybe on Parentree. I am sure others would respond.

I think u need to consider many factors when u think of school for ur kids......and maybe prioritise them or work around all of them.

1. distance - if school is a long drive away, kids may get tired and that would lead to other issues too.

2. the type of school - it should match with your philosophy and resources. U should be happy to send ur kids there and they should be happy too.

3. Peer group - it is very difficult to find an ideal school - each one will have its positives and negatives - u need to see if one outweighs the other. as long as they fit into your idea of a good peer group, i think it should be ok. Ultimately, what moulds a kid is a sum total of all experiences - school, home, outside. kids are very resilient and adjust pretty well to any situation. So if u think they will be happy there, then go for it.

4. U can always create opportunities for socialising - that need not be restricted to school

Have u tried Jaigopal Garodia? I thought someone said it was a good school. But I have no idea about the board etc.?

How is your daughter feeling now? What happened to her vision tests? Have u taken her out from the earlier school?

all the best in your endeavours! Hope u find a happy place for them! Cheers!



suteja 2010-02-20 16:28:35


thanks priya

well i felt relaxed after reading ur reply. ur prioritise gave me aclear picture for what iam upto the school near my place is not competing with any of the city schools there is no kind of pressure in this school but one thing english language spoken is not tha much fair though we do english at home with our children this is the only negative i see in this school can this be rectified by me and my huisband ? pls reply


PD 2010-02-20 21:31:39


yes i am sure u can get her to speak good english. If u can get her to read a lot and listen to spoken english - radio, tv programmes (like news channels etc.)....those are a few ways i think.



suteja 2010-02-21 00:25:34


thanks priya



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