I have a 9 year old daughter studying in class 3. Till last year (academic year 2008-2009, she was in class 2) she was very bright in studies and used to score very high marks. But this year (academic year 2009-2010) we changed her school. She got adjusted to her new school and friends but her concentration on studies has come down.
We had to change her school due to many reasons: 1. School was not recognised. 2. The children were given lots of homework (written work) to do at home everyday which made them very tired and complained of hand pain. 3. If the child never went for a trip / excursion, she would be charged to pay double the amount. AND MANY MORE REASONS......
We now put her in The Frank Anthony Public School, Bangalore which is very close to our place. The school is very big and my daughter enjoys each day at school. She has lots of friends. But the only change I could notice in her is her disinterest in studies, lack of concentration and more playfulness. Instead she watches lots of TV (especially POGO, where she watches Mr. Bean, Chota Bheem etc.) The very sight of TV makes me boil. I shout at her. A brilliant child who used to score 90's in all subjects, now she scores 60's and she doesn't remember anything. She has no worries about studies. She 's just casual and calm.
Sometimes I feel sorry and guilty for her. She was not like this before. My Mother-in-law says that by changing the school have we spoiled her. She shouts back at elders, no respect for them, always in front of TV, demands what she likes and many more.. which no parent will like.
Please suggest some measures where I can correct myself / my child and help her to be her old self and also concentrate on studies.
i can understand that what r u going trough . dont worry everything will b fine .
main think u first stop ur self worring getting hyper n all. its ok everything is going to b fine .relax. i know its difficult but u can do. see the main thing is when she is angry n u too react hard then things go wrong . so b calm when she is wrong or behaving rude or so.i repeat its tuff but not impossible .atleast try. at this age i think u need to trunout smooth to her . may b the frds she is having in school r the same . may b they belong to a very high class family wre kids r pampered a lot . in that case kids over react there love . so may b she has some frds like that .
may b u r reacting high on her change n over all she feels angry that u feel she is good for nothing .[she may think this way]
i undersatnd how u feel when ur child drops down with study level. but give her some time . explain her with all ur love that too in a simple manner. not with all the tensen n future related things . just that is there any probs with u ? whats the matter dear ? r we[u] missing something or doing something u dont like . then how come u have changed so much . say her i miss my child i had dear . i like u love as same but m worried whats wrong is there anything which troubles u in school or home or life. do let me know n b frds .
try to share all the things she has in her. ya but all that will take time . as u have written u get boiled ..plz relax. its good for both of u .
main thing the study u say she has lost intrest . as its new n may b she is not getting more homework n all she is bit relaxed n thinks she knows everything . may b somewhere she feels she is smart n knows all n so on. if ur girl is really gr8 in studies n is in some misconsepctions let her undersatnd on her own . may b she suffer a loss some where but is this the case she may learn on her own.
for sometime stop getting angry n poking her for her studies n her behaviour next to impossible but try to ignore all the wrong thing she does including studies . then u can start with what i have suggested u .
if u want we can talk more on this again.
sorry if i or my any of the line hurted u .
Thank you so much for your advice.
I'll try to follow. I will follow your guidelines and let me see the change and hope for the better.
Hi som14u, u r really great. ur suggestions are excellent. Surely it ll help people like us.
Latha how r u n ur daughter . i hope she is fine now. take care
saha , that nothing to b gr8 i just told what is logical. n its my pleasure if i can help some parents with my views . with gods grace all will b for good. i m always there if anything which can give some one a new look would b gr8.
We are fine..
Well, it should be slow process I suppose. It takes time for my daughter to change herself. I'm trying all means to divert her attention. Let's hope it works!!
Thanks for your kind mail.
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